Another hour; another day; another week, month, year…and she thinks about the things she should have done. But there’s still clothes to be folded, dishes in the sink, dust on the table. And she thinks about the things she could have done. But she’s still in a dead end job, living in a backwards small thinking town, and will never have a million dollars. And she thinks about the things she would have done. But she’d have to been different; braver, smarter, prettier.
“Good morning! May I take your order?”
But she tries to stay on the positive side of things. She and Baby Girl have clothes to wear. She really should stop calling her Baby Girl. She’s growing up so fast. And Saturday, she’s off and can catch up on all the housework and make their meager abode shine. With the schedule change she’s able to go to the library Tuesday nights because she gets off early. Baby Girl loves to go look at the books and read. She can work on her online class while there. It will take a long time but she’s determined not to be in a dead end job forever.
Small town living is a lot different but all in all, maybe it’s not too bad. She keeps this thought in her head as the prospect of not having to stay forever makes life bearable. She’s knows she’ll never have a million dollars unless she wins the lottery and that’s not happening because a lottery ticket is lunch money.
She can’t go back. She doesn't regret the things she’s done to get to where she is. It’s made her who she is today. She’s braver than she’d ever thought she could be. She’s working on a degree even though it feels like she might be retirement age before she finishes. And she really doesn't look that bad, most days anyway. Would she have liked it easier? Of course she would. And it will be. Someday.
“Your change is $1.02. Thank you. Come back again.”
And I wonder, wonder, wonder what I'm gonna do…
I was probably more excited about them than they were but at least the Christmas presents have come in handy with this cold weather!
|Headbands and vests for the girls, beard hat and vests for the boys|
|Wearing it well!|
|Just like the big boys!|
|Even sent one out of state!|
|He says NO...well, maybe!|
Coz shoulda coulda woulda, can't change your mind...